Ugh

So I think I am weaning Anthony. I was really hoping to make it to a year breastfeeding him. I did everything "right" with him, but I am having the same supply issues I did with Amelia. I was able to keep her going longer by nursing her, then pumping, every 2 hours, plus drinking mother's milk tea, and lots of water, and eating lots of oatmeal and stuff. And I'd still have to suppliment. And honestly, I just don't think I have it in my to try and do that with Anthony. I'm just tired. I'm tired of him screaming at me because he's hungry and isn't getting what he needs from the boob. I was sort of okay with this decision until we went to playgroup today. All the other moms saw the bottle and asked if I was weaning him. It broke my heart to say yes. I cried all the way home. None of them were meaning to upset me, they weren't being judgmental or anything. However, it made it more real. I had to tell other people that I have issues with my supply and then I feel like I"m not good enough. Like it's not working because I'm not trying hard enough. And partly I feel like maybe I'm making excuses, because really, I hate breastfeeding. It's painful for me. I don't enjoy the snuggle time with my baby because I'm trying to watch TV or read to distract myself from the uncomfortableness of it. While I fed Anthony a bottle last night, I noticed that I enjoyed it so much more than nursing him. I got to cuddle him, and smile at him and just enjoy snuggling him.

Let me start by saying, I LOVE my children. I am so blessed to be able to stay home wit them. But some days, I am certain they are trying to send me to the looney bin. Amelia is especially good at this. Here is my latest tale of how Amelia is trying to make me crazy.

I am not a good breakfast eater, so a lot of times I'll have a shake or smoothie concoction for breakfast. One morning I made the mistake of not putting the smoothie powder away. On this particular morning, Jeff had some pancakes or waffles and left the syrup out on the counter. ( You can see where I'm going with this can't you?)



















Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing - Photo Books

(Yes, that is a straw she has so she can drink the syrup and powder up Yum yum.)

Now if I could just figure out how to keep the ink pens away from my furniture I'd be good.

I'm doing a little better at drinking water and eating my points every day.

This post is probably going to be a little all over the place, I'm kinda exhausted. Anthony is not sleeping at night. He sleeps for 30 or 45 minutes, occasionally an hour, and then he wants to eat again. It's kind making me crazy. I can do one night with no sleep, but this has been going on for days now.

I took the kids grocery shopping this morning. At the store I like they have those cool shopping carts that have a car on the front of them. So Amelia could ride around in a little car, and I could put Anthony's seat on the top of the cart (he was sleeping.) So we go to checkout, and I find out that the cart won't fit through the check out aisle. The lady says it's okay, leave it there. So I had to unload everything, get the kids out, and try and check out while holding a sleeping Anthony in a 30 pound carrier and hold onto a trying to escape Amelia. Don't think I'll pick that cart again.

Amelia and I are going to make some zuchini bread now I'll let ya'll know how it turns ou.


Oh and if anyone has advice on getting a baby that has until now slept for 6-8 hours straight, to start doing it again, I'd love to hear it!

Shoes

So I have a question for all you parents out there. How much control do you give your kids over their own clothes? Amelia and I have been battling lately. The child Will. Not. Wear. Socks. It's driving me crazy. I get socks and shoes out for her, and ask her to put them on herself, she will only put the shoes on. So next I try putting the socks and shoes on her myself. She takes off the socks and puts the shoes back on without them. It bugs me that she won't wear socks. Should I just let it go? Come on internet, give me some great parenting advice!

I got nothing...

I'm supposed to be blogging everyday, I have nothing exciting to talk about today.

Let's see. We were going to go to Disneyland today, but got as far as the parking garage. It was a mess so we left and went to the mall. I got some pants that fit me and are comfortable. Funny thing is they are the size I normally wear. I guess since they aren't jeans they are just more comfortable. I also got a few shirts, two of which are in a size smaller than I was wearing when I got pregnant. That's weird but I'll take it! In 3 more weeks I can start exercising again.

The house is starting to get back to normal, since having Anthony, it's still kinda cluttered though. If only the cleaning fairy could come between now and Thursday (which is when My mom and Grandma arrive. Eeep.)

Let's see what else is exciting around here? I decluttered a bunch of clothes this weekend. I even parted with my wedding dress. I am never gonna wear it again, and I swear it was taking up half the closet. And I don't want to pay $200 to have it cleaned and a couple hundred more to have it preserved, so why not donate it to someone else who can use it? That's what I keep telling myself anyway. :-)

I am starting to figure out Amelia's crazy behaviour a little bit. She goes completely over the edge when she is tired or hungry. Or when we have unfair expectations of her. Like today, Jeff thought she would be fine going to the mall with no stroller. At nap time. She is not taking naps much anymore, but still needs some down time in the afternoon. We ended up taking Anthony out of his stroller, I had him in the dressing room with me, and Jeff put Amelia in the stroller to calm down, she was being such a crazy girl in the store. by then we had already been wandering around for quite a while, and she was just done. At least putting her in the stroller helped her calm down a bit.